Style Conundrum: The double-my-size red dress

There’s a back story here, people. Thought I’d say that first as I can see you thinking, “why is Emily wearing a dress that makes her look twice as wide as she actually is?” Enter the H&M Red Dress Style conundrum. I fell in love with this dress as I walked past H&M on Regent Street. It leapt out at me from the window with the sort of buy-me gravitas that I seldom find these days on the high street. So in I went and out I walked, with a red dress tucked safely in my bag. I didn’t even try it on. Big mistake. 

As soon I returned home, I threw off my shopping gear and on went the dress that was love at first sight. Well, turns out the mirror has a good way of ruining romantic fashion moments. That same red dress, when I turned sideways, made me look like a whale. So what I do I do? Try not to let anyone see me sideways? Pray that this dress is only seen as I walk down long narrow alleyways? Ain’t gonna happen. So I embraced my inner mou-mou love and packed the red dress for Marbella. Queue the second love affair. This was the most comfortable dress for the moment. It was fiery red and ready for attention, from the front, back and side. I said “screw it” to small style perfection and let my fashion freak flag fly. So who cares if I look like an exploding tomato occasionally? When cinched appropriately, I looked like a red hot tamale, ready for action. 

And that’s the story of the double decker sized red dress…. 


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